Sunday, January 22, 2006

happy birthday mat.

i mean fucker naman. what the hell am i waiting for. im not greeting mat yet because i want to be the fucking last person to greet him. is it worth all the effort? i mean, is he even expecting me to greet him? to remember that today is the anniversary of the day he was born? or was he expecting me to greet him when the clock strucked 12? i don't know. might as well stick to the plan. greet him at 11:59pm tonight. then say i heart you after? hahaha joke lang. yak a whatever. that's too much. kung yung ibang babae e gagawin yun, ako pag-iisipan ko muna.HAHAHAHA yak. whatever gari. e hinde ibig ko lang sabihin, i already thought about this the other night. and i already said i was not so sure if i still wanted to continue liking him because of the gazillion girls out there who seem to [in deng's words] want to get it on with him. you know, there are moments when i actually want to kiss mat. alam mo yung kating kati ka nang gawin kaya lang natitigilan ka. pero alam mo yun, because of lack of experience or kahiyahiya man, because of not having any experience at all, e hindi nalang. pero isa pa kasi naman e ano ba baka mafreak out sha tapos un na. katapusan na. hahaha well anyway.

ayun nabasa ko sa entry ni mat e ayaw muna niya ng responsibilidad [which im trying to relate on the relationship level] , or something like that. in my point of view, when you enter a relationship, you're not actually acquiring a new responsibility. for me, the person you're having a relationship with is someone who's supposed to help you with all the responsibilities. in short, that person is supposed to help you lighten the load. ayun. that's what im looking for,someone to help me out with all these responsibilities and at the same time, someone i can help too, someone i would love to take care of. e yown wala naman siya kaya sige wala nalang.

im actually okay right now. i find joy in spotting. vince and this other guy i see in church. both are cfad students. i just don't know what church boy's name is. nevermind.

happy birthday mat.

11:59pm january 22, 2006

(8:20 PM)