Monday, May 28, 2007

i love you but it seems like you don't love me enough para magtiis ng onti para sating dalawa. from the start, sinabi ko na na hindi tayo legal pero hindi ko inisip kahit minsan na hindrance yun kasi ang importante sakin, mahal kita, mahal mo ko. naiinis ako kasi konting tiis lang hanggang pasukan ang hinihingi ko parang di mo pa makaya. so what if we don't see each other until school starts, we've been apart much longer. two weeks of not seeing each other should sound like a breeze.

nalulungkot ako, tangina. pati si mat sinasali niya. it was never a secret that my mom likes mat for me.(actually my whole family likes mat for me. :| ) i like mat. he's a good friend. it sucks that my mom doesn't understand na it's not about us liking mat for me, it's about him liking me back. i've already given up this "thing" like, two years ago? we've grown to be very good friends and never kong naramdaman na nabawasan ung kabutihang ginagawa niya para sakin dahil lang hindi ko sha naging boyfriend. nalulungkot ako kasi ginagawa pa ni boyfriend na rason na sha ang gsto ng pamilya ko at hindi sha. bakit, kung halimbawang gusto ko parin si mat hanggang ngayon, it won't change anything. i can like mat forever pero kung hindi naman niya ako gusto in the same way na gusto ko sha, wala naman talagang mangyayari. hindi ko talaga maintindihan. hindi na ba nagmamatter kung sino ang gusto ko ngayon?

ayoko na tangina naguguluhan nako. kung hindi ko na talaga kayang isave ung hilaw na relationship nato, so be it. i think nasabi ko na ung gusto ko sabihin. kung di niya kayang magtiis para sakin, then he doesn't love me enough.:(

(9:28 PM)

right now, i am fighting to save a relationship that's barely 3 months old.

i feel like crap.:(

(8:57 PM)

1. The song youve been most singing to
yourself recently? >>>
paano kita...iibigin...eww last song syndrome kasi

2. What do you currently want right
now? >>>
mawala na ung maga sa mukha ko

3. What did you do today? >>>
bonded with espi

4. Are you hungry? What would you
like? >>>
surprisingly im not hungry kahit na noodles diet ako ngayon...

5. What have you been thinking about
most today? >>>
siya... and at the moment, it feels like he's going to break up with me...

6. Would you ever just sit outside and
watch the stars? >>>
i already did that and it feels good..

7. Do you do a lot of surveys? Why?
>>> yes because i am freakin bored.

8. What is your current annoyance? >>>
pera din.

9. Do you want a new cell phone? >>>
di naman...

10. Are you waiting for someone right
now? >>> si pam

11. What time are you going to bed?
>>> hanggang di pa dumadating si pam, di ako matutulog..

12. Name one thing you're looking
forward to this week? >>> enrollment so we can meet again.

13. Are you planning on visiting some
old friend? >>> yeah i guess so

14. Can you make new friends easily?
>>> kinda

15. What would you do if your best
friend turned gay? >>>
hahaha bakla sila baklaaaaaa

16. Do you plan out what you wear the
day before you wear it? >>> sometimes..

17. Has anyone ever told you "You
dropped your pocket", and you looked
down looking for it? >>>wala pa naman

18. What is love to you? >>> love to me is having to sacrifice something to achieve happiness.

19. Have you ever fell for your best
friend? >>> yes yes yes

20. If you had a chance to save
someone significant to you, would you?
>>> Oo naman bakit hindi

21. How many times do you eat each
day? >>> whenever i feel like it.walang bilang

22. How do you cheer someone up? >>>
i crack joke about myself

23. Are you a morning person? >>>

24. Is it easier for you to fall
asleep or to be woken up? >>> neither

25. Have you ever had breakfast in
bed? >>> before

26. Are you a picky person? >>> not really

27. Think of one person, stick with
it. you dont have to say their name.
Would you pick them up stranded 100
plus miles away if it was your
birthday? >>> OO!!!(this sucks, may naisip nakong tao before i even finished reading the question.)

28. "Haha hoohoo thought youd get the
money too, greedy greedy greedy try to
have your cake and eat it too."
Where'd that come from? >>> nakalimutan ko na e pero it sounds familiar.

29. What's cookin good lookin? >>>

30. Has your best friend ever hurt
your feelings? >>> minsan

31. Give two reasons why you get
distracted in class. >>> may iniispatan ako.

32. Seriously. Do you know how to
dance? >>> pwede narin hahaha. seriously?

33. Do you think its funny when people
get hurt? >>> no

34. Who makes you laugh the most. Give
at least two people >>> hs friends and college friends haha

35. If you had to guess, how do you
think you're gonna turn out in life?
>>> im going to be a famous chef.

(8:20 PM)